To the Mom who doesn't have it all together

Monday, February 9, 2015


When I first started reading mommy blogs I always wondered how these super mama's managed to not only make beautiful, time consuming homemade foods and body products, keep a perfectly organized home, homeschool a bajillion children and blog about it as well; all with a smile on their face and a great attitude. Though I was truly inspired and encouraged by them, I felt like I must not have it all together since I was barely able to get anything thing done throughout the day... let alone blog.

Lo and behold here I am today...blogging and doing all those things I thought I could never do; though I only blog when I can since I have a 14 month old that is my siamese twin, have to homeschool two boys in grade school and a daughter in kindergarten, put food on the table and keep the house somewhat liveable...you get the picture!

Since feeling led to start this blog I have a new perspective on life behind the blog. Though I try to be as real and transparent as I can, there are many things I can't always share or really don't want to. It's much easier to share my accomplishments and success rather than my failures and catastrophes.

I love taking pictures of my kids, projects and recipes and try to make them look as nice as I can but for every picture I show there are 20 that didn't turn out right and lots of messes cleared out of the way to get at least one decent shot. Because who wants to look at dirty messes and failed recipes? There is also usually a lot of crying and whining in the background that thankfully you can't hear!

Looking at other mom's (their homes and blogs) and comparing ourselves is unfortunately a part of the mommy culture, but it's not how God calls us to live.

"When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves by themselves; they are not wise." 2 Corinthians 10:12


Somewhere on my journey as mom and wife I chose to stop comparing myself to everyone else.(though I still struggle at times) As mother's and wives we are all going to do things differently and have different priorities for our families. There is not a one fits all rule for motherhood. Yes, there are many times when I am not doing it right and neither are you, but that is a part of the learning and growing process. Sometimes we have to figure things out for ourselves and our families.

I am so thankful for those wise mama's who saw me doing everything wrong and never told me, who gave me advice when I asked and encouraged me when I failed.

When I start to think that I have it all together God quickly reminds me that I most definitely do not. On one such occasion this week God showed me how super human I am not. Read here.

 We all are going to mess up and fail; we are flawed beings. Yes, it's pretty depressing but let me encourage you dear mama with this truth...we serve a perfect Savior who is able to take a our messes and failures and redeem them and use them for his glory!! He has grace for us every day. Don't you feel better now? I know I do! It's so freeing to admit that we don't have it all together... but we serve the One who does!

"But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."( NIV 2 Corinthians 12:9)

When you start to feel bad about all the things that you don't do right remind yourself of the things you are doing right!

Your house may not always be clean but you let your kids make forts in their rooms.

You may not blog but you are writing stories of joy, inspiration, encouragement and love on the hearts of your children, husband and friends.

You may not always make gourmet, organic, homemade meals but your husband's and children's tummies are always full.

You may not be be crafty or organized but you find your own ways to be creative and make the most of your time and home.

You kids may not always be wearing clean clothes because you let them play in the dirt.

You may feel like you are always an emotional wreck because you care so much for your family.

You may not always have time to get all the laundry put away because you play with your kids when they ask you.

You may not always act out of love and have the best attitude but you ask for forgiveness and humble yourself when you need to.

You may not know how to teach math or english well to your children but you teach them about Jesus who does all things well!

Do you ever feel like you are the only mama who doesn't have it all together or know what she is doing?

Do you tend to view blogger mom's as superhuman and compare yourself to them?

How do you keep your perspective and not get caught up in comparing yourself to other moms?


17 comments:

  1. I used to compare myself to others, not good. Then well I turned 40 and 40 was soo freeing, I felt more self confident, I didn't care anymore I realised I did have some talents, just different to my friends.

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  2. Forty is not too far off for me, so thats something to look forward to;) So thankful that God has all given us different gifts and talents, he doesn't want us to be the same he wants us to be like him!

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  3. Just wanted to let you know that this post is among the featured at MMM and I'll share it across my social media sites today. Help yourself to a featured button. :)

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  4. Hey, popping by to say hi! This is a subject often on my heart, trying not to compare.

    Rebecca
    www.hiphomeschooling.ca

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  5. Fortunately I've gotten beyond the comparing thing, most of the time. For me, it's a matter of priorities...some days the "clean house" is a priority, sometimes it's a project, and sometimes it's surviving and letting the kids play however they want.

    I do think people, especially mommies, forget that while the mommy bloggers have it all together, we're really only showing the good stuff.

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  6. Awe, yes! We are all so different. Let's stop comparing ourselves to each other and just do the best we can in any given moment :-)

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  7. I'm stopping by from Mom2Mom Monday. Thanks for the reminder that I don't have to have it all together all of the time.
    http://michellenehrig.com

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  8. What a well written and relatable article! I often feel like I am struggling but a baby giggle or a your the best cook ever comment from my 4 year old after I make her (an only slightly burnt) grill cheese can make it all worth it. Thanks for sharing! Found from Moms Blog Party

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    1. Thanks Kristen! So glad our kids love us no matter what:)

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  9. The secret to being content is enjoying what God has given you and not to compare your life with others, Such great words today! Stopping by from Reflect. Http://janncobb.com Would love for you to share your blog on the link up.

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  10. Great post! Comparison can be hard. I have to remind myself that God has made me the way I am for a reason and a purpose and didn't make me to be just like everyone else! I can gain inspiration for others, but I shouldn't compare my journey to theirs!

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    1. Yes, we are all made so uniquely in God's image!

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  11. I think it is important to really let new Moms know that NO ONE has everything together. No one is perfect and we are all doing our best to be the best Moms that we can be to our children. Some bloggers aren't real and that always bothers me. I try to be honest in my posts so that others can relate and see I am human.

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