I picture myself jet setting to an amazing destination, lounging by pristine waters, visiting a quaint city, backpacking through beautiful mountains, exploring ancient ruins, eating gourmet food, meeting new and interesting people and having fun and exciting experiences.
Yeah, I dream big. I think I have been watching too many travel shows. The truth is I have done many of these things and they just haven't left my system. The result is, my everyday ( very blessed) life starts to look uninteresting, stale and boring. Lets face it, doing the dishes, non stop cleaning, changing dirty diapers, and cooking isn't always that glamorous.
You might have a different picture of what your day dreams look like but we all go through times of restlessness and longing for something out of the ordinary...something more. Whatever position we are in in life we can find something or someone to be dissatisfied with.
Most of the time I am very happy and thankful for where God has placed me and who he has brought into my life. I really am living out my dreams as a mother and wife, though I daily have to fight my tendencies to compare my self, my house, my clothes, my looks, my finances, my ministries, my personality to someone else's. I have to say though that I do not wish to have different children or a different husband... I think they are pretty amazing, though not without their faults:)
As I start to let myself go and covet what others have, wish I could do what they do, go where they go; I begin to become discontent and stop seeing all that I truly have.
"I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry,whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:12-13
Once I start down the path of seeing everything greener on the other side, I am unable to see the beauty, adventure and greenness that I am experiencing right now. The more I focus on what I don't have and what I wish I had, the more I fail to see what I do have.
A lot of the things I desire are not necessarily bad things; most of them are actually good things, but if they exceed my contentment in Christ alone and are not in his will, then they are not good. He is the only one who can truly satisfy me.
When I choose to think that I know what would satisfy and fulfill me best; I am taking my trust from God and saying that I know what is best and he doesn't.
When I start to realize that I am heading into dangerous territory in my thoughts, I have to fix my heart and mind on Christ alone and seek his will above my own.(Matthew 6:33)
Deep down inside my spirit, I know that he has the best for me and that nothing that I desire could ever compare to the plans he has for me. As I learn to trust him completely with my dreams and desires his desires become mine and I become truly content with the life he has given me.(Jeremiah 29:11)
My "grand" dreams and desires pale in comparison to his grand design for my life... that goes beyond the boundaries of this world.
You see, when I get those yearnings and dreams for something more; they are God given, but they are not for what I think they are. I desire more from this life because I wasn't created for this world.... I was created for heaven!!!!
It is a daily struggle and a fight to be content. Yes, my body was made for this earth but my spirit longs to be connected with my new body in heaven. Some days I get tired of fighting my flesh and sinful nature. I want to be made holy as he is holy, to be pure as he is pure, to see as he sees. It's a continual battle until they day he sees fit to take me home.
"Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, because when we are clothed we will not be found naked...now it is God who made us for this purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come." 2 Corinthians 5:2,5
What a glorious day that will be when I see him face to face!! I have to continually remind myself of it. I am not living for this world, my hope is in heaven! This world is not my home, I am only passing through.
Honestly, when things are going good I want Christ to delay his return but when I am struggling with my sin and all the sin I see in the world, I long for his return. I am so thankful he is in control! Each day I want to speed his coming by being faithful with what he has given me to do and pray his kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven.
Even in my moments of greatest joy and happiness there is still sin and pain right there with me, there is still a longing for my true home, an ache to be reunited with my loved ones who have gone before me and a desire deeper then anything....to be truly united with Christ.
I have found in this short life of mine, that whenever I want something in a bad way, for example: an amazing vacation, bigger house, nicer neighbors, new car, a way out of a certain situation...etc....I usually don't get it when I want it. I have come to realize I have to surrender my will, my desires to God and trust him with them.
God cares about our desires and dreams and like a good parent, wants us to give them to him for safe keeping.
One of my favorite verses that I have always kept close to my heart is:
As a parent there are many times I have to say no to my children because I know that it would not be to their benefit to say yes to all they want. The fact is I just can't always give them what they want, whether I want to or not. They have to learn to trust me and my husband, and know that we truly love them, but that doesn't mean we just give them what they want all the time.
I have always seen God as a Father to me. I believe that when we surrender our desires to him and put our trust completely in him( even when it is difficult) he is truly delighted that we would give him the desires of our heart. As I learn to trust him and become content in him alone...guess what??? He gives me even more then what I could have ever imagined!!!
"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more then all we could ever ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us." Ephesians 3:20
Are you feeling restless, discontent, dissatisfied?? Search your heart and ask God to fill those places in your heart that only he was meant to fill. Whatever situation you are in life you will find a peace and contentment that can only be described as out of this world... because that is where you will find it.