Lately I have been feeling overwhelmed.
Everything and everyone is calling my name.
I admit... I love that I am needed. I love that I have friends and family to fellowship with; to help and encourage eachother in times of need. There was a time in my life when I was so desperate and hungry for these days. This rich season I am in is a beautiful answer to my prayers but I easily find myself overburdened by the needs of myself, my family and friends. Saying no has never been easy for me and I find myself in many difficult situations as a result.
There are so many things I want to do, so many friends I want to get together with, so many projects I want to tackle, so many people I want to be there for.
So many things I need to do... dishes waiting to be washed, laundry to be cleaned and put away, drawers to be organized, school lessons to be planned, meals to make and plan, little ones that need my attention and care, people to pray for, ministries to help with.
Not to mention BBC period dramas to watch, books to read, naps to take, blog posts to write, miles to run, spring cleaning to do, dates to go on with my husband and children. All of these good things, but nonetheless my list of things to do is never ending.
I think to myself, "If I could just have little more time in the day, if I could be more organized, stay on top of everything, keep up with everybody...then I wouldn't be stressed, then I would have it all together."
I don't ask for much...ha..ha!
The truth is I want to do more then I realistically can, I need to do more then I physically can but...
I can not possibly do it all...no one can.
There is just no way.
Some days I feel like I have conquered the world and I have all my ducks in a row. The next day the laundry is an insurmountable mountain that I don't see how I can ever scale, the dirt on my floor a bottomless pit that I can never dig my way out of.
You'd think I would be good at multitasking by now but I am not...I have many burnt pots to prove it!
My mind has a hard time keeping up with my body.
I love making lists... It keeps me sane and takes some of the load off my mind. It feels so good to cross each task out! I feel like I have really accomplished something!
Your list might look different from mine but nonetheless we all have things we want and need to do.
No matter how many things we have crossed off our list there will always be something new to replace what we have checked off.
Today was just one of those days that everything on my list was calling to me and instead of trying to do it all... you know what I did? I crawled into bed and pulled the covers over my head; trying to drown out all the voices.
Just as I was starting to drift off to dreamland I heard small voice crying through the door; awakening me to reality. So I got up and did what I had to... what I was able to do, one thing at a time. No, I didn't get the rest and escape I was hoping for but I was able to step back and ask God to help me do what he has called me to do and let go of trying to do it all. As looked to him I was able to focus on what I have to do...what I am called to do.
First and foremost I am called to seek, love and follow Christ and in so doing everything else will fall into its rightful place.
Yes, I want a perfectly clean house, all our meals planned out, school room in order, satisfied and happy children and husband. I want to be a good friend, loving wife, mother, daughter and sister...but last time I checked I still live in an imperfect body in an imperfect world.
I can't do it all on my own but... I can do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me!(Philippians 4:13)
I can do all the things he has given me to do! All the extra things I think I have to do, I will never be able to do unless he has called me to do them. I know God can stretch me to do what I can't! It's so freeing to let go of the expectations of others and myself and just focus on what God wants me to do!
I love this quote I ran across the other day from Alistair Begg, reminding me that I am the one overburdening myself, not others, not God.
God will give us what we need, to do all he has called us to! When we find ourselves overwhelmed and overburdened we need to come to him, asking him to show us what needs to go and what we need to be lay down at his feet. Its so easy but we make it so complicated!
He says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." Matthew 11:28-29
God never wants us to be over burdened! He wants us to give him our burdens so he can give us rest!
I am thankful God is allowing me to come to the end of myself and really take a closer look at all the things I am filling my life with.
The more I see my inadequacy to do it all; the more I see how much I need him and how I can't do anything without him!
Do you find yourself trying to do it all?
Are there good things in your life that you need to say no to?
What do you do when you get overwhelmed?