But unfortunately there is this thing called our sin nature.(Romans 7:18-19) We all come into the world with it whether we like it or not. We have to continually fight against it, it will be our battle till the end of time. We want to do what we want to do, and that is just that! We will suffer consequences but we just don't care sometimes. We are selfish and self centered, we want what we think is best for us.
I wanted the kids to listen and no matter how well I disciplined them or tried my best to be a good mother, they were still going to fight me at times and I unfortunately would not always respond in the best way.
I am glad I didn't call my husband ( even though I am sure he would have tried to encourage me) but I did cry out to God and ask him to help me: to give me patience, wisdom and love. I felt God's overwhelming presence as he spoke to me and comforted me. He knew right where I was at, he knew I could not handle this job on my own. He would give me strength when I didn't have any, love when I didn't feel it, patience when I was ready to lose it. He was forming me and making me into the mother he wanted me to be; not dependent on my strength or "amazing" mothering skills, but on his wisdom, his love, his strength, his patience.
As I called out to him in my weakness, he was glorified... as I admitted my great need for him, and acknowledged that I couldn't do it on my own, but that he could... through me. (Romans 3:5)
I wrote this poem last year as a result of what he spoke to me, I have it up on the wall and read it often to remind me that God will give me all that I need, to be who he has called me to be.
"I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Phil. 4:13
I thought it would be fitting this mother's day weekend to share it with those of you who are mother's, in hope that (if for some reason you struggle at times too) that you will be affirmed in your beautiful role as a mother as I was.
Whatever role in life you are in know that if God called you there, he will give you all that you need to accomplish it!
Wanted: A Mother
By Rebekah Harris
I was told just be willing and you will be hired
As I started my job I realized it called for more than I was qualified for
My boss said, “Be patient, what you lack, I will give you even more."
The hours are long, I’m on call twenty-four seven
But the payoff is big though I might not see it till I get to heaven
Yes, there are times when I want to quit
When the complaints are constant and I can't handle the demands another minute!
But when I look into the eyes of my employer
I see he too has tears of frustration and hurt
Yet with love and patience he continues his work
He knows the overtime Iv'e put in, the pain that Iv'e endured
For he too has sacrificed himself and yet has been ignored
So like Him I cherish the times, when I am reminded why I applied for this job too
Just to feel an embrace and hear the words, “I love you!”
Some might say,"Why not do something for yourself?
You are wasting your life, give this job to someone else."
But each day I learn not to trust in myself or any other
As I am entrusted to care for the least of these
And look to the One who created me to be… a Mother